Oh man. This is something that I know many of us are guilty of. Okay, okay so we all know that it’s easier said than done, but I’ve recently learned a lot about asking for help even though the wee independent woman inside me was constantly screaming and making me even more stubborn! HA!
But in all fairness, I’ve learned how important it really is. We as humans, have for some reason adapted to believing that asking for help is ‘weak‘ or makes us appear to be inadequate to support ourselves. But in reality, this is not the case. It’s really the greatest and purest form of being human. We all know the stigma associated with mental illness and unfortunately this falls in this realm, which I know that many of those in societies all over the world are trying to change, we can start by changing it within ourselves and within our circles. Especially in the case of asking for help when needed.
If you have those closest to you, that you trust and feel safe with, confide in them. Tell them how you feel. Whether it’s anger, sadness, hopelessness or stress, whatever it is, talk about it. What you’ll soon see, and of course learn, is how amazing a listening ear can be and how relieving it is to share your sorrows. How it can simply make your days somewhat brighter and the safety of knowing that someone has ‘your back’, makes a world of difference. This is also why therapy can be so effective.
Don’t be afraid to speak up, because people can and will surprise you. You may even find that the person you are confiding in has experienced or is experiencing the same. I often find myself confiding in my parents and family and the safety of their love and understanding is really all you could ask for. It’s a wonderful feeling to be able to be open and honest about your feelings and I must say, talking to my mum always eases my anxiety.
I also, recently asked my best friend for help. I didn’t exactly say, “Hey, I need help.” Instead, I sat down with her one evening and told her that I was struggling with a few things. Her immediate reaction was, “Well I can’t fix that but this is what we can do!”
So a couple of days later, she fetched me and took me for a drink and we shared a spot of lunch. We talked about all the things that I was struggling with and so did she and in that moment, we listened to one another and eased each others stress. The little things, the big things and whatever the things! We then spent the whole day sitting beside the pool, relaxed and having some good laughs. If I hadn’t of leaned on my best friend, I would have, most probably cried the day away, feeling miserable and stayed in bed. I feel like this is one of the many reasons that best friends are made for.
Asking for help and support is alot easier once you get past the silly notion of it being a negative thing.
Give it a try, ask for help and see what a difference it can make.